self-love on valentine’s day
happy friday, every one! i hope you all had an amazing week and have fun plans in store for the weekend.
valentine’s day is next week, so naturally that’s what we’re gonna talk about today… but i didn’t make a gift guide… i don’t have any unique valentine’s day date ideas… there are tons of posts like that out there and i feel like doing something a little different. so, instead i want to talk about the importance of self-love on valentine’s day and why it’s so important… whether you’re single, dating, or committed.
self-love. it’s one of those buzzwords that’s all over the wellness world. i know… it sounds cheesy AF, but there’s a reason you’ve been hearing it everywhere. and that’s because it’s effing important. why?
because you have to love yourself before anyone else can. you have to treat yourself with respect if you want anyone else to treat you with respect. you can’t expect to have an amazing, loving, supportive relationship with someone else if you don’t have one with yourself first.
it’s a pretty straightforward concept. it’s kinda the sibling of the golden rule, right? “treat yourself the way you want others to treat you”… i like that.
here’s a few examples of what happens when you put yourself first and show yourself some love:
- your health and happiness levels will go through the roof
- your relationships with others will improve
- you’ll gain a true sense of who you are, not who you’re “supposed” to be
- you’ll set boundaries for yourself and others [aka you’ll take less sh*t from people]
- you’ll stop sabotaging all of the good things in your life
- you start to realize the role you play in manifesting your experiences… both good and bad
so, regardless of what your “status” is on valentine’s day this year… as justin bieber once said… baby, you should go and love yourself. [the context is different here, but whatever, any excuse to quote the biebs, amiright?!]
have valentine’s day plans? that’s great! but you should still make a conscious effort to appreciate yourself. it’ll set the tone for your relationship and how the person you’re with treats you, whether you’ve been dating for 3 weeks or 3 years.
if you’re single, buy yourself that necklace you’ve been eyeing for ages or go to dinner at your favorite restaurant. if you don’t do nice things for yourself, how can you expect anyone else to ever want to do nice things for you?
personally, as someone who’s single on valentine’s day this year, i bought myself a new pair of sneakers and am getting a [much needed and way overdue] massage tuesday after work… then i think i’ll crack open a bottle of wine and catch up on summer house…
and i cannot wait.
how are you going to show yourself some love on valentine’s day? would love to hear your ideas in the comments below!
let go: 2 little words with a big impact
last year, i read a book that completely changed my life: spirit junkie by gabby bernstein.
there were so many amazing takeaways from this book that i wouldn’t even know where to begin, but one message in particular really resonated and stuck with me… and is now the mantra that i live my life by [or at least try to… no one’s perfect, remember?]…
yep. that’s it. two little words. one short sentence. a simple meaning that can really go a long way.
i had been following gabby’s work for a while… listening to her webinars, reading her blog posts… but i had never actually picked up one of her books. i received spirit junkie for my birthday, and dove in not really knowing what to expect.
little did i know that i would eventually end up crediting this book with “changing my life” and introducing me to a concept that would become my “mantra”. but i am so happy that it did!
so, what does it mean to let go?
speaking from personal experience, i have anxiety… over just about everything. without going into detail, anxiety can impact pretty much every aspect of your life, and can be very hard to manage, especially when you feel justified in feeling the way you do.
so, when i was introduced to the concept of “letting go”… it resonated with me because it’s something i need to do with just about everything. i need to let go of insecurities, i need to let go of trying to please every one i meet, i need to let go of the need to be perfect, i need to let go of the fear of failure, i need to let go of all of the judgements i’ve placed on myself and my abilities, as well as those of others… i really could go on for days.
so, letting go, the act of releasing your expectations, and living your love from a place of love rather than fear, doesn’t mean that you just stop caring or trying… it doesn’t mean that you give up…
it just means that you trust the universe to get you where you’re going. it means that you trust the process of your life… recognize that everything that happens to you [both good + bad] can teach you a lesson. you still have to work hard, you still have to keep looking forward, but when you let go of anything that feels wrong, forced, or just isn’t making you happy, you open yourself up to miracles. and when you’re open to receiving miracles, the universe delivers.
and this is something you have to do every. single. day. you don’t just “let go” once and forget about everything. you have to keep doing it, which is why i purchased a my intent bracelet with these two little words on it.
i wear it every day, and it serves as a constant reminder to pause, take a deep breath, step back, and let go any time i feel like i’m getting caught up in the “what ifs” or “you’re nots”.
so… what do you need to let go of?
3 things you can do to improve your health that don’t involve diet + exercise
this time of the year is all about “resolutions” … many of which include diet and exercise. i’m sick of resolutions and sick of talking about “eat this, not that” and “5 moves to a flatter stomach”. let’s mix it up and talk about 3 things you can do every day to improve your health that don’t involve diet and exercise.
1. meditate. you’ve probably heard a lot about meditation… especially in the last year or so. it’s one of those things that’s becoming less weird as more and more people, from every walk of life, incorporate it into their routine.
it’s no longer just something that yogis or crunchy hippies do. that’s because it’s effing good for you. it’s known to reduce stress, help manage anxiety, slow aging, improve sleep, increase happiness, and strengthen the cardiovascular and immune systems. pretty crazy, right?
if you’re new to meditation, i recommend starting out with just 5 minutes per day, and using a guided meditation [you can find a lot of options on youtube… i really like this one]. once you’re comfortable with 5 minutes, up it to 10… then 15… then 20… and so on. i like to meditate first thing in the morning for about 20 minutes… it really helps to wake me up and start my day on the right foot!
2. spend time outside. let’s get real for a sec. most of us spend the majority of our time inside. at work, at home, commuting, at restaurants, the gym… i could go on forever, but i think you get the idea. all of these places are manufactured… they aren’t natural. ever think that actually spending time in nature could be… what we’re meant to do?
spending time in nature can boost serotonin levels, which helps stabilize your mood and regulates a number of bodily functions, including digestion and sleep. being outside also exposes you to the sun a.k.a. the best source of vitamin d there is.
take a 15 minute walk on your lunch break [yes, even if you live/work in a city], sit in the park and read a book, or find a restaurant with outdoor seating for your next boozy brunch. a little bit of time outside goes a long way!
3. drink water. okay, okay, maybe this technically has something to do with your “diet”… but not really. so i’m going for it. how many times in your life have you been told you need to drink more water? how many times have you told yourself that you need to be drinking more water? probably a lot. so, why don’t you just effing do it?
not to beat a dead horse, but water is like… SO good for you. water IS life. your body needs to be fully hydrated to operate properly. seriously, pretty much none of your systems can work the way they are supposed to without it. it aids digestion and kidney function, flushes out toxins, keeps your skin glowing, energizes the muscles, and can help manage hunger, which ultimately aids in weight loss.
and luckily, drinking water is really easy. we just have to make sure we’re actually doing it. i recommend buying a nice reusable water bottle [m obsessing over these swell x gray malin bottles] and taking it with you literally everywhere. having a nice water bottle actually makes me want to drink more water. kinda how buying new workout clothes motivates me to start working out more. also, keep a glass of water by your bed, and drink it first thing in the morning. you need to get re-hydrated after a long night of rest!
implement these 3 things in your daily routine [or even just one of them at a time] and you’ll notice a difference in how you feel… physically and mentally. you will improve your health… and your body will be so happy with you!
obligatory “new year, new me” post… or whatever.
happy new year, guys! i hope that everyone had an amazing holiday seaon… i certainly did!
it’s been a while, hasn’t it?! i took a little hiatus from posting for a while… not for any particular reason, except that i just needed to do it. the end of 2016 was a whirlwind for me [in the best way], but i’m excited to be back in action!
2017 is here. and you know what january means… resolutions. lots of ’em. we’re only in week two of the new year, so resolutions are definitely still a hot topic regardless of who you’re talking to. personally, i’m not really a fan of new year’s resolutions. i’m not into the “new year, new me!” mentality for a few reasons.
first, why now? just because the year on the calendar changed, suddenly you’re going to change, too? you don’t have to wait until it’s a new year… or month, or week, or day even… to make a change. do it whenever the eff you feel like it. the sooner you start taking action, the better.
second, have you thought about how you’re going to make that change? a lot of resolutions are empty. they aren’t thought out. there aren’t any action plans to go along with them. there aren’t smaller goals set and timelines created to help get to the large, overarching goal. and how can you seriously expect to be successful without a plan?
and finally, i don’t like resolutions because they don’t work. they just don’t. why is this? because with resolutions, one slip up is often discouraging enough to make us throw in the towel. and that’s not what life is about. i think the mentality of having “goals” to work towards, rather than having “resolutions” to stick to makes all the difference. looking back… i don’t think i have ever, and i mean ever, accomplished one of my new year’s resolutions.
[DISCLAIMER: if you’ve had success with making resolutions in the past, then by all means, keep going for it! i’m just speaking from my personal experience.]
this year, i have about 5 things that i really want to accomplish [it’s important to not be working towards too many goals at the same time… it gets hard to focus and can be discouraging] and in the spirit of the new year excitement, i figured i would share them with you here. i mean… everyone’s doing it… right?
1. get back to blogging regularly. after my hiatus [and about a year of posting really sporadically] i want to put more time and energy into bananas + bellinis this year. i have a lot of ideas… so i’ll be focusing on taking things one step at a time… as always… baby steps!
2. start teaching yoga. i’ve taught a few classes here and there, and quite a few private sessions since i completed my teacher training in 2015, but i really want to work my way onto the schedule at at least 3 studios this year.
3. get back to a more balanced workout routine. i’m obviously all about balance, but when it comes to working out… i tend to be a little off. i’ll have a week where i workout 4-5 times… followed by a week where i don’t work out one. single. time. this year, i want to maintain a consistent workout schedule [without getting carried away], while still mixing my workouts up. i’m hoping that my new classpass membership will help me with this!
4. read 2 books per month. reading is something that i have always loved to do, and when i lived in new york, my time spent commuting on the subway was dedicated to reading. i would fly through books, and no matter what, always had at least 1 hour a day to read. now that i drive to work, i don’t have time automatically worked into my schedule for this… and i miss it! i’m kicking the year off with born a crime by trevor noah [#swoon]. what are your other recommendations?! leave ’em in the comments below!
5. have the most fun ever. all the time. although i listed this last, i think it’s the most important thing… my “theme” for 2017, if you will. if i’m not having fun, i’m just not gonna do it. and on the flipside, when it comes to the things i have to do [you know, the things involved with being an “adult” like working, paying bills, doing chores, etc.] i’m going to make an effort to not hate every second of it. if i have to be doing it, might as well have fun in the process right?
so, to wrap up here, i’m back. i’m ready for 2017 [only took me about a week to wrap my head around the fact that we’re even in a new year to begin with]… and i hope you’re all excited to see where bananas + bellinis goes this year! so happy to have you along for the ride.
what are your thoughts on goals vs. resolutions? and what are your goals for 2017?! leave them in the comments below… i always love a little inspiration!
i went without make-up for 1 week + this is what happened
make-up. one of the things i love to hate and hate to love. i’ve never been one of those girls who cakes on the foundation, chisels out her cheekbones a la kim kardashian, or even knows how to create a smokey eye [but if you are, more power to you], and i’ve always taken a pretty simple approach to my make-up routine. i try to stick to as few natural products as possible… bb creme with spf, a little cheek stain, mascara… done. maybe a little more than this for a night out… but you get the idea.
part of the reason i don’t have a very extensive make-up routine is because i’ve been blessed with pretty clear skin. i never experienced acne the way some people do, but i’m human, after all, and still get the occasional breakout. also, it’s safe to say that i’m not always [re: never] good about taking my make-up off before working out, or before going to bed after a late night… not exactly the best approach to skincare.
… and over the past couple of months, i started seeing exactly the type of things you would expect when you’re working out and sleeping with your make-up on… breakouts… dullness… weird discoloration… and for the life of me i couldn’t find a way to “fix” any of it.
all of this obviously frustrated me… a lot. i started thinking about going back to using face wash and lotions that are full of harmful chemical ingredients… something i’m totally against… but, at least those types of products tend to work… right?
because using these types of products go against just about everything i stand for, i decided to do a little experiment first. what would happen if for a week… just one whole week… i stopped wearing make-up completely, and allowed my skin to breathe… all day every day?
sound scary? it was. make-up has become a crutch for so many of us. i always joke that i can’t go anywhere, including my own kitchen, without having at the very least bb creme and mascara on… and i have friends that are notorious for showing up to go hiking… yes, hiking… in full make-up. i wish i was kidding. i really do.
so, i went for it. no make-up. one week. here’s what happened:
day 1: fully uncomfortable. i felt like i had to give just about everyone i came in contact with a disclaimer that i was purposely going make-up free for a week because i was aware of how bad my skin was, and ask them to not judge me. in retrospect, this is pretty sad… but kind of where we are as a society, right?
day 3: okay, wow, i definitely feel like my skin looks terrible, but this is exactly why i’m doing this. my skin needs a chance to breathe and heal itself. but still, this effing sucks.
day 5: oh, sh*t! all of these blemishes are starting to clear up, aren’t they?! great, this is working.
day 7: damn. my skin hasn’t looked this clear in months. and not only am i noticing the difference, my friends have noticed, too! that must mean things have seriously improved. the blemishes are just about gone, i can actually describe my skin as “glowing” rather than “dull”, and you know what else…
… i feel more confident. weird, right?
after i went without make-up for a week, i realized that it literally doesn’t effing matter. it just doesn’t. my friends didn’t give af when i told them i wasn’t wearing make-up, they didn’t judge me [and they wouldn’t have judged me even if i hadn’t asked them not to]…
… and if they had judged me… then that would have been an entirely different conversation.
this post has turned out to be waaaaayyyyyyy longer than i expected it to be, so, here’s the moral of the story. make-up is great. i’m not giving up make-up. i’m not alicia keys, and this isn’t a new way of life for me. i enjoy using make-up and always will, but i do plan to use less make-up, especially on a day-to-day basis. my daily routine is going to consistent of the bare minimum: bb creme with spf, cheek stain, mascara, maybe a little colored lip or highlighter. easy peasy. nights out? events? i’ll go all out when i feel like it.
this little experiment has taught me that wearing a full face of make-up every single day is just not necessary… unless i want it to be. going forward, i’ll be much more comfortable not only wearing less make-up, but wearing no make-up on the days where i wake up a little late, or my skin needs a break… or when i just don’t effing feel like it.
and never forget: it’s not about whatcha look like, it’s about the kind of person you are. anyone can make themselves look pretty, but if they’re a sh*tty person… that’s way harder to change. and no one likes a sh*tty person.
want to try going make-up free? do it! and then tell me about it! i’d love to hear how it goes… so email me! email@example.com.
thirsty thursday: iced drunken spice latte feat. bizzy
this week, thirsty thursday is getting a bit of a boost because it’s also national coffee day. [see what i did there?!] booze meets coffee… 2 of my favorite things being celebrated in one super holiday?! talk about a great day!
a few months ago, i partnered up with bizzy to bring you an easy fix for all of your cold brew cravings, and i’m super excited that we’ve joined forces again to bring you a boozy iced coffee recipe… and a giveaway! [more details on this later!]
’tis the season for all things pumpkin spice, but since it’s been in the 90’s this past week in l.a., i’m not quite ready to make the switch to hot coffee.
enter: bizzy! this iced drunken spice latte is the perfect way to balance out the fall season with the summer temperatures.
- 1 shot of bizzy cold brew concentrate
- 1 shot of kahlúa pumpkin spice
- 1 shot of half + half
- 2 tbsp. of canned coconut milk
- optional garnish: whipped cream + nutmeg
- in a cocktail shaker, combine the bizzy, kahlúa, half + half, and coconut milk.
- shake until well mixed.
- pour over ice, top with a garnish of whipped cream and nutmeg [and a festive paper straw] if you’re into that kinda thing.
- sit back, relax, sip, and enjoy!
interested in giving this whole cold-brew-at-home thing a try?! you’re in luck, because the team over at bizzy will be giving one lucky winner a free bottle of bizzy [that’s 6 cold brews!] along with a few little extra goodies from me!
to enter, head over to my instagram [@bananasandbellinis] for all of the details, and be sure to share this with all of your cold brew obsessed friends… the winner will be announced next thursday, october 6th!
let’s talk about food-shaming
in the day and age of body positivity, self-love, and balance, it’s [unfortunately] still very common for things like body-shaming to happen on a regular basis. just look at the comments on literally any celebrity’s or blogger’s instagram feed and you’ll see people telling them they’re too fat, too skinny, ugly, too made-up, not made-up enough, dressing too slutty, dressing too conservatively… i’m getting annoyed just typing all of this out, so i’m gonna stop there.
while body-shaming gets a lot of press, one thing that’s a little less talked about is food-shaming. food-shaming is essentially the same thing as body-shaming, only instead of targeting the person, it’s the food that the person is eating that’s being attacked. which basically ends up turning into a personal attack… even if it’s in a roundabout way.
not sure what i’m talking about? food-shaming typically sounds a little something like…
“you’re eating that?” or…
“do you know how many calories are in those?!“
“ew. this wrap is disgusting. i can’t believe you’re still eating it.”
“what is that smell? it’s your food?! i’m literally gonna throw up.”
so, what’s the big deal? people have different tastes… it’s all a matter of opinion… right?
the problem is this: a lot of people feel bad enough around food as it is. they’re so wrapped up in trying to decipher the whole “dieting” thing that they can’t keep straight what foods are “good” and what foods are “bad”. they don’t know if they should count calories… or track macros… or cut sugar or carbs or dairy or gluten. they don’t know if they should go vegetarian… or vegan… or paleo.
or maybe, they had a bad day and just want to eat some effing ice cream.
not only is it confusing, many people feel massive amounts of anxiety when it comes to eating… regardless of if they show it or not. maybe they’ve tried atkins… they’ve tried the south beach diet… the ducan diet… and none of those worked, so they went vegan… and that didn’t work either… so they gave up, and are simply doing their best to try to figure out what will work for them [remember, it’s different for everyone].
or they were craving pizza and decided to just eat a damn pizza. some people listen to their cravings and act on them. crazy, i know. [and no, this doesn’t mean they’re weak. it just means they listen to their bodies.
if you haven’t already guessed… i’ve been there, and it’s effing stressful. the last thing i need is someone commenting on my carb intake or how i should be eating this instead of that… or how disgusting they think the food i’m eating is… that last one really bugs the sh*t of me.
the solution here is actually really simple and goes back to something we all learned in kindergarten: if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.
this might all sound silly, but i can tell you from firsthand experience that negative comments about what i’m eating [especially in the moment] really make me uncomfortable. they make me feel as if i should be embarrassed by my food choices… and sometimes, it’s bad enough to make me just want to stop eating all together. and if i have felt this way, as some who generally doesn’t give af what other people think of me… and also as someone who loves food… there’s a pretty good chance other people feel the same way.
if you follow a vegan diet and you’re at dinner with your friends and someone orders a steak, don’t tell them where the steak came from. if you don’t like the sandwich you ordered… and your friend is eating the exact same thing… don’t eat it. and don’t comment on how “effing gross” you think it is. that’s food-shaming at its finest and it’s not cool.
[disclaimer: i’m guilty of this kind of sh*t, but have been working on biting my tongue and keeping my opinions to myself lately.]
it’s time for all of us to get off of our pedestals and just worry about ourselves. i get it, your intentions might be good and you might be coming from a caring, loving place… but, even if you do mean well… just stfu and mind your own business. unless someone asks you for advice… you’re opinion on what they’re eating just does. not. matter.
just worry about taking care of yourself and being mindful about what you’re putting into your own body.
have you ever been food-shamed? or food-shamed someone else? how did it make you feel? share in the comments below!
what i ate wednesday: london, baby!
if you follow me on instagram and snapchat [which you should be, duh!] you’re probably well aware that i spent the first 2 weeks of july in the u.k. and ireland with my family. it was a [much needed] vacation that exceeded my expectations in just about every way imaginable… the food being one of them.
it comes as no surprise that i. love. food. like… i really love food. i consider myself to be a “foodie” and aside from my pescatarian diet, will try juuuuusssstttttt about anything. so, when i started to hear that the food in the places we were going kinda sucked… i was… disappointed… but ultimately decided to brush off the haters and go in with a completely open mind.
and it turns out… those people didn’t know what the eff they were talking about. need proof? look no further! here’s another edition of what i ate wednesday… featuring london, baby!
full english breakfast at muriel’s kitchen:
traveling from l.a. to london involved being in airport/on a plane for nearly 24 hours, so by the time we arrived i was ready for some real food. since we landed in the late morning, brunch it was! i found muriel’s on instagram, and when i saw that they served traditional english breakfast [aka full english] i knew this would be a great first stop… a real “welcome to the u.k.” kinda meal, ya feel me?
a truly traditional full english involves bacon and/or sausage, but luckily for me, muriel’s served a vegetarian version, swapping out the meat for bubble and squeak, another traditional english dish made from potatoes and cabbage. i [obviously] added a mimosa because #vacation… perfect way to kick off the trip!
fish + chips [+ beer!] at the fish house:
naturally, our first dinner in england could have only been one thing… fish + chips! i’m honestly happier than i should be that i had never in my life experienced fish + chips until this moment… i feel like it made it that much better… and i instantly became obsessed [and proceeded to eat way more fried fish over the next 2 weeks than anyone should… so sue me].
the fish house was my favorite of them all… the breading was crispy, the fish literally melted in my mouth, and the chips [aka fries] were just how i like ’em… i normally cannot stand mayo… but in europe served with fries? bring it on.
high tea at the wolseley:
on day 2 in london, my mom, my aunt, and i sent the boys off on their own so we could enjoy afternoon tea at the wolseley, which was recommended to me by a dear friend who grew up between london and new york… oh. my. god. i don’t even know where to begin here.
the scones with jam and clotted cream: insane. the finger sandwiches [egg salad, cucumer, smoked salmon with cream cheese] were made with the softest bread of all time. the desserts, the jasmine tea, the champagne?! this is a meal… no, an experience… that i will remember for the rest of my life. speechless.
indian fare at thali:
ever since i went to india in 2014, indian food has just never been the same. luckily, london is known for having incredible indian cuisine all over the city, and we certainly had plenty of options. i had never tried thali before, but it was a perfect way to have a little bit of everything considering that everything on the menu sounded incredible.
thali is essentially a giant round sampler platter, served with basmati rice in the center and naan on the side… and then gulab jamun for dessert. my thali consisted of saag paneer, spicy red lentils, tandoori potatoes, fried okra with onions and tomatoes, and a yogurt dip. still didn’t live up to indian food in india… but it came pretty damn close… and the naan? i could have had about 4 more servings. so. damn. good.
ice cream at marshfield farm:
on our day trip from london to stonehenge, we stopped in bath for a few hours, and our tour guide insisted that we go to marshfield farm for ice cream. that soft serve on the top there? clotted. cream. ice cream. need i say more?
so, in conclusion… london was pretty spectacular, food-wise. the verdict:
must eat: high tea at the wolseley
must drink: a beer literally everywhere you go
honorable mention: fish + chips at the fish house
next time, for what i ate wednesday, i’ll dive into the food in the isle of man, belfast, and dublin… london really just needed its own post because of how effing good everything was.
where are your favorite london spots?! comment below… i’ll be making it back to this city one of these days!
vacation mode: ACTIVATED
today is a good day. it’s friday. it’s a half day at the office [for most of us] thanks to the 4th of july falling on a monday, but most importantly, for me, today marks the beginning of my first real vacation in almost a year…
… and i’ll be off to the u.k. in a few short hours!
if you’re a regular over here at bananas + bellinis, you already know how i feel about traveling… and if you’re new to these parts, i’ll keep it quick… i’m obsessed with it and nothing makes me happier.
this vacation is big for a few reasons. first, it’s the only extended vacation [two whole weeks!] that i’ve taken since moving to l.a. and starting my job at snacknation [it’s been almost a year ago now… woah]… needless to say, i’m effing ready for a break.
second, all of the places we’re visiting are places i’ve never been. i’ve been lucky enough to have done quite a bit of traveling around europe in the past, but the u.k. is untouched territory for me, and i can’t wait to check some new countries off my list.
finally, this trip is special because i’m traveling with my parents, my little brother, and my aunt and her husband… and we’ll be celebrating my dad’s 64th birthday in liverpool [you know… like the beatles song “when i’m 64″… get it?!]. needless to say, this is going to be an amazing couple of weeks and i’m jumping out of my skin with excitement right now and couldn’t focus on anything if you paid me.
as always, i’ll be active on instagram, facebook, twitter, and snapchat [username kelsey1988] so you can follow along with my adventures in real time… and expect recaps from each city and of all of the food in the weeks following my return.
if any of you guys have recommendations for things to do, places to see, or things to stuff my face with in london, liverpool, isle of man, belfast or dublin… leave them in the comments below or tweet me [@bananasbellinis]… i think the best way to see a new place is to balance the touristy stuff with a more “local” experience, so i’m open to all suggestions! balance can really apply to all aspects of your life, you know?
on that note, i’m signing off! have some loose ends to tie up and a carry-on to pack before i head to the airport this evening. enjoy the long holiday weekend, stay safe, stay balanced, and i’ll see you on the other side… first stop… london, baby!
book club: mastering your mean girl
a few weeks ago, i announced that i would be launching a “book club” series here on bananas + bellinis, and i could not be more excited to dive in with my first official review for mastering your mean girl by melissa ambrosini.
mastering your mean girl definitely falls into the self-help or personal development category, and based on what i’m all about here at bananas + bellinis… and my own personal struggle with body image, self-confidence, and just generally being my own worst enemy… this book really, really resonated with me.
just to give you a little bit of background, melissa ambrosini is an author, coach, and speaker who defines herself as an “ambassador of choosing love over fear in every moment”. yea, she’s pretty badass, and after years of following her on social media, i was lucky enough to attend an event she hosted in venice a few months ago with a couple of my girlfriends.
not only did we receive a copy of mastering your mean girl, but we also got to meet melissa, and spend an evening in safe space with other women who can relate to her journey, and hear all about exactly how choosing love over fear and silencing your mean girl… you know her, she’s the voice in your head telling you you’re not smart enough, pretty enough, rich enough, skinny enough to do xy and z… can change the entire trajectory of your life.
of course, choosing love over fear is one of those things that’s waaayyyyyy easier said than done. i mean… if it was easy, wouldn’t we all be doing it? melissa doesn’t deny this truth, and even states:
“my journey is far from over, though — i choose to keep learning, growing, and evolving every day. i choose to keep mastering my mean girl every second. and i continue to choose love over fear in every moment.”
and she’s right. this isn’t one of those books that you can read, put into practice once, and be done with. choosing love over fear, and telling your inner mean girl to go eff herself when she pops up is something you have consciously do day in and day out… for the rest of your life. i know that i’ll be revisiting this book… whether in bit and pieces or in full… for years to come.
the other thing that i really love about melissa’s approach is that she stresses the importance of taking care of yourself. i’m all about self-love and self-care, from the inside out! when we love ourselves, we want to take care of ourselves, and when we’re taking care of ourselves it’s easier to love ourselves… it really goes both ways. she encourages everyone to take a very balanced and holistic approach to wellness, something i can clearly get behind!
on top of this just being a great read, melissa also includes “inspo-actions” throughout the book… places where you’ll pause, reflect, and actually implement what you’re learning along the way. remember, choosing love is something you have to consciously do, so actively doing this throughout the book helps to show you how and where you need to apply this approach to your own life, based on the battles you are fighting with yourself.
all in all, in you’ve ever struggled with stress, anxiety, body image, or self-worth, engage in negative self-talk on a regular basis, or are just trying to find a better way of living, but don’t know where to start, i suggest grabbing a copy of mastering your mean girl and diving in a.s.a.p… you definitely won’t regret it!
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